About Me

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Four years into widowhood, after one year of incredible happiness and nearly 14 years of single blessedness. Have given up perfect manicures and pretty hands in order to resume playing the soprano recorder and to see if I can figure out how to play bluegrass banjo. Singing in the shower. Still really, *really* love to knit!

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Wow! what a day!

I have my temporary Texas driver’s license, complete with married name and a no-glasses, deer in the headlights expression. (The temporaries now come with a photo.)

I have a new passport photo, and I’ve printed off the renewal form. I will run by the 24/7 post office after work and get that in the mail. Good thing I looked at my passport yesterday. I thought it expired in April. It expires on Monday, but I will do expedited shipping with delivery confirmation, so they will not get an expired passport to play with or give me grief over.

I got the iron-on interfacing to fix the missionary’s slacks. I will take care of that later this week.

Lorelai is now titled in both our names. Beloved will get the new sticker on her windshield for me after fixing breakfast and before I scoot out the door this morning.

His car is now titled in his name, preparatory to our selling it and buying his mother’s truck.

His late wife will be removed from the deed to the house. We have various options to put me on the deed, one of which involves the bank gouging us for $900. We do not like that option and will be exploring others, including refinancing the house at a different bank, once we are out of debt in a few months.

We traipsed all over Home Depot yesterday, buying a few items and pricing others. He was trying to explain how the soaker hose system will work in our garden. I was physically tired (this was toward the end of our jaunt), and while I am interested in how it works, I will be more interested as he is putting the system into the back yard and I have a visual to go with the explanation. I grinned up at him and said, “Cashmere. Alpaca. Vicuña.”

He got it. And laughed.

I will deal with Social Security, which requires a certified copy of the marriage certificate, when I get it back from the State Department.

We came home with more return address labels. I started writing thank-you notes while we were sitting at the Department of Public Safety. And we priced a label-making machine. I want to do some research on various models and see if we can find one elsewhere, maybe a little cheaper.

OK, breakfast is down the hatch. One ginormous box is unpacked. I am going to sluice off and hit the road. Hoping for another productive day at work (we’ve already prayed over it). His mom comes home from her quick trip to California today. We will meet up back here at the ranch, maybe about 7:00, and use one of our gift cards for dinner, because neither of us is likely to be interested in cooking.

So blessed!

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Busy boy, busy girl, busy us.

It’s approximately 6:30 as I begin this post. Beloved, like me, sets the clocks ahead so as to be on time. The computer says 6:31; the clock on the wall in front of me says something else.

I have been up for three and a half hours. In that time, I have emptied two boxes of books, moved all the storage tubs over to the west side of my studio, where the bookcases are filled, so that I can get to the empty bookcases. I have five boxes of books ready to be emptied, but my ankles said it was time to lie down for a bit before the shower. After fifteen minutes in bed, scratching my hubby’s back and rolling my feet and ankles, and another fifteen minutes in the shower, I am ready to lick my weight in wildcats.

Which is a good thing, because we have given ourselves a honey-do list that would daunt lesser mortals. I have taken the day off. If all goes well, we will come home with a driver’s license for me in my married name; a re-licensed Lorelai and both cars jointly-titled (have yet to come up with a name for his car, which we will be selling soon in order to buy his mother’s truck, so it’s rather like when we were raising goats ~ I didn’t give the kids pet names, because I knew we would be eating them); the paperwork begun for a new Social Security card; my passport renewed; stuff from Home Depot to do various projects; stuff from JoAnn’s so I can mend a pair of slacks for one of the missionaries; and other things that will occur to us while we are out and about. Some of his boys are supposed to come over late this afternoon or early this evening to help him move railroad ties and pull up fence posts, so we can put in the soaker system for our garden. He made the first pass with the Troy-Bilt yesterday.

I suspect that tomorrow morning will be another day (like Sunday morning) when it is exceedingly difficult to roll out of bed. But I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.

The second baby sock is about ready to have the toe bound off. And I think I may have found the box that holds the umbrella swift and yarn winder, so that I may wind some of the new yarn to make another pair. I would not be at all surprised if, when I go to bed tonight, I have cleared enough stuff in my studio that we can set up my worktable.

Right now there is a stack of empty boxes in the living room that resembles a page from The Cat in the Hat. But now it’s time for me to blow-dry my hair and get ready to stand in line(s).

Fear and tremble, oh ye bureaucrats! Ms. Ravelled and Beloved are heading your way.

Monday, February 27, 2012

Typingreallyfast.

Heading to Home Depot in my peppy like-new car after a quick breakfast, to pick up new knobs for the medicine cabinet in the master bathroom. We only need one knob, but while I like the eclectic look, I will like it a whole lot more if we have two that match, and they are red. Marking my territory, as it were.

We got a lot accomplished this weekend. Had so much fun with Mel and Squishy on Saturday. There are some great antique shops in the little town we visited. We came home with a red glass wind chime shaped like a fish, and a large metal whirligig that has a bajillion fish on it and is now out in our back yard. I have officially been out in the back yard (I don’t remember having done so before; I just opened the back door and tethered Gracie to the line so she wouldn't jump the fence. Two or three steps out the door does not constitute being out in the back yard, in this woman’s book.

Yesterday we spoke in Sacrament meeting, and then I taught Relief Society, and we home/visit taught the bishop and his wife, and came home and fed the missionaries. By 7:30 or so, I was plumb tuckered out. Went to bed, woke up around midnight, and poured a glass of chocolate almond milk and made two slices of toast. Then I went into my studio and opened nine boxes of books. The small red bookcase that nestles up against the armoire is now filled, and the black bookcase in the hall is mostly full. Beloved has nine boxes to break down, which should keep him out of the pool halls for awhile.

Remember how I said that no new furniture would come home with us on Saturday? We found a lovely hutch, just the right size and shape to fit in the corner of the breakfast nook and hold all the dishes I brought with me, plus maybe my Kitchenaid mixer, for half off. He was tempted. I was tempted. But the vendor is leaving that space at the end of the month (i.e., Wednesday), hence the fire-sale price. And she was only accepting cash, not gift cards or debit cards or anything other than Ben’s and Alex’s and Abe’s. So she lost a sale. I figure we will find something equally lovely (it was exquisite) closer to home at a fair price (maybe not such a bargain, but a good price) where my debit card is an option. I have yet to take Beloved over to the my antique dealer in Arlington.

The yarn store is every bit as fantastic as Mel said it would be. I came home with single skeins of sock yarn in manly colors, to whip up more baby socks for the next wave of babies in our ward. The current second sock is nearly done. I also picked up a skein of alpaca laceweight in a brand I’ve heard is good. And she carries Noro, both the Kureyon and Silk Garden, Kureyon Sock but not Silk Garden Sock, and other varieties of Noro I have yet to try. She also makes and sells fudge.

Lots of little piddly paperwork-y things to do today, so I’d best get going. Happy Monday, y’all.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Got an early start this morning.

Probably because I went to bed early last night. I was really surprised to wake up and find that I had slept until almost 5:30. Beloved was working on his sacrament talk when I went to bed (he was on a roll, and I know how that is, so we had family prayer in the kitchen, and I came in here and pulled the covers over my head.) He tells me that he was up, typing and editing, until about 1:00, and that I was out like a light.

I vaguely remember waking up a few times to roll over, but no TMJ issues, and I hit the floor running this morning. The two bookcases that I moved into the studio earlier this week? They are now across the room, in the corner, looking very much as I envisioned them. There is enough space in that corner for me to install my two-headed floor lamp, assuming it still works after the move. The top has a definite subluxation, but I can jiggle everything back in place, and as long as the wiring is unharmed that may end up being the corner where I set up my spinning wheel, after I buy a new one.

I played a lot of Tetris with boxes this morning. I moved a dozen or so Rubbermaid storage tubs, all of them more than once, in order to clear paths for one thing and another. I manhandled ~ I guess that should be ma’amhandled ~ the long bookcase that Brother Sushi helped me to build, around a sharp corner and through the end of a narrow hallway into my studio (the thing is at least six feet long, probably longer, but I wasn’t about to stop shoving and dragging long enough to find out if my tape measure is in my toolbox where it belongs) and along the wall where those two bookcases had been.

I retrieved my narrow red bookcase from the dining room closet where Beloved had tucked it. It is now in the first corner (the one I worked on last weekend) between the armoire and the seriously fancy bookcase, with the tall plant stand in that corner between the bookcases and Mehitabel (my dress form) on top of that.

There are actually a few books on shelves. All of the Rubbermaid tubs are back in my studio, stacked in two or three towers, and the two-headed lamp is closer to where I want it to end up.

My left leg is rigid with lymph from about four inches above the ankle, but I cannot help thinking that all the walking, lifting, etc., is good for me. I do know how to lift things properly (a lasting blessing from having been married to a chiropractor, above and beyond knowing how to spell subluxation, and what it means), so my back is in no danger.

We will be heading over to Mel and Squishy’s in about an hour and a half, and then the four of us are heading up to Farmersville to explore the antique shops and the yarn shop. More walking, which will be good for me, lunch at a restaurant the kids like, and excellent company.

Right now, Beloved is fixing breakfast. We had a few stalks of asparagus leftover from dinner, and he is chopping that up, adding some cubed ham from the freezer (leftover from our honeymoon; we were pretty seriously hammed-out by the end of that week), and some soft goat cheese that we need to use up. Omelettes, woohoo! I have definitely earned mine this morning.

When we get home this afternoon or this evening, after dinner or a nap or both, I will start putting books in the bookshelves. That will open up the hallway and get rid of a dozen or more small boxes.

I found a box with some of my clothing. I found another box with stuff that Beloved scooped off the floor in my bedroom at the duplex, stuff that had fallen off the fallow side of the bed and was happily composting until we had to move it. I foresee a lot of laundry over the next few days. I also foresee being able to wear different clothing to work next week than my co-workers have seen me in for the past month and a half.

The skirt I ordered from CJBanks, an emporium I hadn’t heard of until last Sunday, arrived at work yesterday. It is just the sort of crazy wonderful classic with a twist item that I love to wear. Longish skirt, stretch lace overprinted with cream and grey and black, multipaneled, with a petal hem. Remember the skirts from the 70’s, where each panel was shaped roughly like an apostrophe, and the skirt swirled like mad when you walked, and it was perfect for dancing? A modified version of that. So I am over the moon. Beloved likes it, too. It’s the teensiest bit shiny, and he likes that it’s lace, but is a little disappointed that it is lined (he’s such a boy). It seems to be very well made, which it should, as originally it was $65.50, and I got it for $9.99 and free shipping. Feeling mighty good about that. Now I just need to find my black top to go with it, or see if the new spot remover will take the stain out of my cream short-sleeved tee that I had put in the cut-up-for-doll-clothes pile, assuming I didn’t already take the scissors to it. But I think I saw it in a box earlier this week. Will check on that, after breakfast.

Crazy-hungry. And my head is a little stuffed up from all the dust of unpacking boxes and shoving furniture, so my nose can’t tell me if there are promising scents wafting my way from the kitchen. But there are promising sounds.

P.S. Found the charger for my camera batteries. Really jazzed about that.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Friday. Huzzah!

All in all, a great week almost put to bed. If I have the kind of day at work that I’ve had recently, all of my to-do’s will get to-did (or to-done, if you’re not from Texas) and I will finish filing the rest of my emails, inbound and sent.

On Wednesday, that’s what I did all day. I whittled 90+ emails down to less than 20, with another 30 saved or deleted from my outbox. It’s a lot more complicated than you would think. If I get, say, an email from our court reporter with an e-tran and exhibits, each of those has to be saved (the e-tran three separate ways, including a zip file), as well as the email transmitting it all. On Wednesday I filed emails from three depositions, all of which had multiple exhibits. One of those depositions involved nine or ten emails and 16 exhibits, or something like 50+ individual steps.

Today I have one report to type for Attorney B, some dates to calendar on an item from Wednesday’s mail, and then I want to double-check myself on scheduling orders that I’ve calendared since we moved to the new system. I want to make sure that I have cross-noticed everybody. And so, about once a quarter, I do this, and I rarely find a slip-up.

I had my performance review on Wednesday, and it went far better than I’d expected, given the come-to-office-manager meeting a few days earlier. I was given two specific items to work on, both of which are eminently do-able.

And in the meantime, my desktop is looking far more like it used to. I like that.

We finally received credit for the one and only duplicate wedding gift. I hate sending things back. But this was something we really, truly needed only one of.

The temple was wonderful, as usual, and I came home flat wore-out. One of the brethren held the door open for me as I headed for my car and asked, “Going home?”

“Gee, I hope so!” And grinned wearily at him.

Beloved and I had talked about using one of our restaurant gift cards for dinner tonight, meeting there in two cars right after work to beat the crowds. But I ate too much salt yesterday, and my legs are still feeling a little inflamed, and the left ankle is puffy. Not a lot, but enough that I notice it. So I will come home, and we will cook dinner and crash early. Tomorrow we go to a little town between here and Oklahoma that has great antique shops and what is reputedly a good yarn store.

I have promised Beloved that no new furniture will come home with us until we have the house arranged the way we like it, with the stuff we already have. I told him I was making no such promise about yarn. We are doing a day trip with Mel and Squishy, and she says the yarn store is incredible, basically mill ends and close-outs, some junk yarn but mostly good stuff. I would like to get enough to knit pillow fronts for two of the inserts we got as wedding gifts, since the cabled ones at Pottery Barn that I put onto our registry, sold out early for Christmas. [Yes, they were red. You had to ask?] I put them on the registry more as inspiration than anything else, because I can design cooler cables and have the fun of knitting them up..

Second baby sock (to go into the gift drawer) is approaching completion. I will very likely finish it at church on Sunday, if not before.

Lorelai’s all fixed. I am having to wire a ginormous sum from my line of credit into my regular account and will also have them send enough to throw onto one of Beloved’s credit cards in preparation for paying it off. I remind myself that, dividing what I am going to give the mechanic by six (I have had Lorelai for six years this month) yields a sum that is far less painful. And if I had been able to maintain her the way I suspect that most folks maintain their cars, I would not have had to pay for all this at once. It would have been in smaller bites, spaced out over several years. But this should function as a facelift, tummy tuck, and liposuction. I am hoping that it gives her another five-plus years of useful life. And I am now in a position to do all the scheduled maintenance, because I live in a house with two incomes.

Boggles. The. Mind.

This paycheck got hit for retroactive premiums for Beloved’s health insurance, so it’s not exactly pretty. But the only bill I needed to pay was my cell phone, and we do not need a Costco run this time around. Just fresh fruits and veggies, eggs, and milk or milk substitutes. Which reminds me that I have half a gallon of dark chocolate almond milk in the outside fridge.

I got the button sewn on Beloved’s shorts, and the fleece liner reattached to the inside of the watch cap belonging to the good brother who drives him down for chemo every other Thursday. I moved another bookcase into my studio yesterday before breakfast. And now I am going to sluice off and wolf down a bowl of raisin bran and boogie on out the door.

I hope to have all sorts of adventures to share with you after our day trip tomorrow. Still no pictures, as I have yet to find my charger for the camera’s batteries.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Just checking in.

The past two mornings, I’ve leaped out of bed and headed straight for the studio to unpack boxes. Two big one before breakfast, yesterday, and a big one and little one today. Plus a whole bunch more with contents labeled for future reference. I am almost ready to move another bookcase in along that wall. The long bookcase/sofa table that I made with Brother Sushi’s help, will need to go out into the garage for Beloved’s workshop, unless it will fit between the IKEA armoire and the north wall. And I think that’s a just-won’t scenario.

Work has been mostly terrific this week. I am getting a lot done. On the other hand, when I got there yesterday I learned that one of the paralegals had been let go. It’s one of those situations where it’s none of my business, and more than a little unnerving, because to the best of my knowledge she is a woman of impeccable integrity. And one of my friends. So, I am sad both for her and for myself. I did talk it over with Beloved this morning, and I feel a little better, but still.

The second baby sock now has a neatly-turned heel. I did that at Knit Night last night. Between work and Knit Night, I picked up a button for Beloved’s camo shorts, and thread, and needles, and a purple silicone thimble, because while I know where my scissors are, the rest of the necessary supplies are in a box. In my studio. Somewhere. This will also enable me to do a quick mending job for a mutual friend. That will be tonight’s task.

Beloved has already taken off to pick up his mom for her doctors’ appointments. Time for me to fire up his red car and head to work. Lorelai is in the shop, having a whole raft of things done that most mortals are able to take care of as they crop up, but which my cash flow and/or mindset have not allowed. So she is getting a new catalytic converter (the O2 sensors are just fine), new tires, new timing belt, tune-up, new spark plugs et al, alignment, new tires, and three new motor mounts. And probably things I am not remembering at the moment, but which are typed into a Word document on my computer at work. She might be ready to pick up after work today. Or it might be tomorrow. In the meantime, I am making peace with an American car. And very grateful that we have a spare.

Notwithstanding how much I’m going to have to pull from my line of credit to pay for this, it is still cheaper than buying a new car, and I’m hoping it will extend her useful life another five years or so, which would be a record for me. Typically I kill a car every six years or so.

Gotta scoot. Carefully, because I’m not sure his car likes me. I have to fire her up (maybe it’s a him?) before I buckle in, otherwise the anti-theft device locks everything up. I get there. I get there, and I’m slow.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Insert brilliant title here. Or not

Much progress and Tetrising yesterday. That one hour nap I was planning? I woke up five hours later. But we did have leek and potato soup, and Beloved pronounced it true comfort food. There are five portions of it in the outside fridge (said fridge being out in the garage, not out in the back yard). We will eat well this week.

Watched an episode of Iron Chef last night. Duff from Ace of Cakes against Michael Somebody, who won. But the food was amazing, and somewhere last night, I think while eating dinner and watching Diners, Drive-ins & Dives (which I quite like) there was mention of lobster macaroni and cheese. I am now a woman on a mission.

After that, roughly about 10:30, Beloved was pooped and we had family prayer. He went to bed. I went back to my studio and played Tetris with the boxes until I was able to move two bookcases in there. I also moved half a dozen more boxes allegedly full of kitchen stuff out in that general direction. Beloved will deal with them as he has time and inclination, throughout the upcoming week.

I went to bed about 2:00 this morning. Yes, I am officially tired.

My eldest grandson (no longer BittyBubba) was ordained a deacon at church today. There is a small celebration at his house in about an hour and a half. In the meantime, I am torn between putting on my grubbies and shoving more boxes around, and playing on FB and the AARP website until then. Maybe I should do a little of both. I’ve done one read-through of the material for my sacrament talk next week. I also need to print off the material for my RS lesson next Sunday. The poor sisters will be getting a double-dip of me. You should pray for them.

We were supposed to home teach / visit teach the bishop and his family, but one of the family members is feeling under the weather, so we have rescheduled.

When I went out to Lorelai this morning to go to church, she made a very unhappy noise at me. I texted and called Beloved, who had gone to church early because of his clerk responsibilities, and he told me where to find the keys to his mother’s truck. I managed to get that started, but after church it didn’t want to go. I must not have been holding my mouth right, because it fired up just fine when Beloved tried.

Lorelai will be making a trip to the car doctor first thing in the morning. I will be a little late to work, and I will have to pull money from my line of credit to cover it, but we will also pay off (and close) a smallish-balance credit card while we are at it. The APR on my line of credit is significantly lower than what the credit card company is charging Beloved. We’ll have that all squared away in a few months, and then we will pay off his other credit card but not close it. As we will be buying his mother’s truck, we will not be entirely out of debt by the end of the year, but we should be reasonably close. His disability covers all the basic bills. We just need to sit down and work out a budget and figure out how much allowance to give ourselves each month.

The additional insurance premiums should start coming out this paycheck. I need to remember to switch over to the married withholding rate when I get to the office tomorrow. I love it that I am only having to pay $28 to Uncle Sugar for 2011; at least that’s how it stood when I saved my tax return a couple of weeks ago.

Naptime, I think, but I will set the alarm.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

And better. Well, mostly.

Work, per se, went almost as smoothly on Thursday and Friday as it did before we moved to the two new programs. My desk looks like it did, back in those thrilling days of yesteryear. I completed all of my to-do’s and dealt with the mail (and most of the email) in a timely manner. I have two new suits to open next week, and two more for the week after that. The first two are in two neat piles, with everything I need to set up the paper file (such as it is) and mail off the bits that I will create when I open them. My attorney was out both days, and I got everything taken care of for Attorney B, and Attorney C (for whom I am backup every other Friday, as his secretary has a compressed work week) needed nothing from me, and I remembered to log off the postage meter at the end of the day (one of my adjunct duties when the person ordinarily in charge, is out of the office).

The temple on Thursday night was even better than usual. I was home a little after 10:00 and headed straight for the kitchen table for some cookies and milk and a thorough perusal of the latest Pottery Barn catalogue. The cat was so loving that had I not known he was a neutered male, I would have taken him for a lovelorn female.

Friday night I was double-booked and didn’t remember until the activity I attended with Beloved was over and we were heading on to dinner. *Facepalm*. I stood up Firstborn and probably Secondborn and my hair magician and who knows who else. I left Firstborn a voicemail and a text message. She still loves me. Whew!

Last week was, frankly, brutal and by the time 5:00 rolled around I was half past brain-dead. Which I am easing up on now.

Woke up at 4:30 this morning after about six(!) hours of sleep and headed straight for my studio. By the time we left for the hospital to get Beloved’s chemo pump removed, I had moved nine boxes of food and kitchen stuff to more appropriate locations, plus the small cooler (six-pack size); put one of my short metal filing cabinets in what I think will be its new place; had a (perfectly adequately balanced) stack of boxes play lemming and leap for the floor, showering two of my plastic drawer towers with the contents of my water glass but not breaking the glass itself; removed the contents of the drawers that got showered and spread them out to dry; and eaten a second breakfast when Beloved woke up.

Banking is done. We now have a joint account at his bank. Pump is off. We hit two grocery stores on the way home and made a lovely batch of soft tacos for lunch. Beloved is taking a one-hour nap. I am letting lunch settle a little more, then will do the same. My goal is to get all of the bookcases moved into my studio (and out of the dining room), even if they are not all filled by bedtime.

When I was driving home from work last night, I tilted my head to one side, and my range of motion was pain-free and significantly greater than a month ago. So I tilted it to the other side. Same result. It was a long light, so I felt my traps, just inside my collar. Not as relaxed as Beloved’s, but no longer resembling suspension cables for any major bridge you’d care to mention.

This marriage thing? I think it might be good for me!

OK, naptime, and then more shoving-around-of-boxes, and I’m planning to make the leek and potato soup I was craving last weekend when we couldn’t get the grocery stores to cooperate by providing leeks. We were victorious this weekend, and I have three sassy organic leeks for roughly what I would spend for ordinary ones at Central Market.

Life is good. And soon to be leek-flavored. Oh, and first baby sock (church knitting for the past two weeks) is done, all but weaving in the ends. Woohoo!

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Better.

The morning meeting ran an hour long. The afternoon meeting finished on time. So I only lost three hours yesterday, not four. I did not complete the two items that Attorney B wanted me to do yesterday for his trial on Monday, but my attorney is out all day in depositions (and thus cannot be dictating new work for me), and tomorrow morning as well. If I catch another day of light mail, then I will complete those two items for attorney B and a report which absolutely must go out today, which now takes precedence. (I did talk to attorney B about the first items, and he said today would do just as well.) Then I can bang out the fourth item tomorrow morning and be, in theory, all caught up on my to-do’s.

I am still struggling to get my email properly filed. And there is some mandatory training which will eat another hour, but maybe I can finish that tomorrow afternoon. Maybe. In the meantime, I did the first two of fourteen installments of that just before going home last night.

In this ward the home teaching and visiting teaching assignments are currently being combined, at least when a married man is assigned as the home teacher. So last night Beloved gave the home teaching message to one of our dear sisters, and I gave her the visiting teaching message, and then we just sat and visited for the better part of an hour. She’s a good woman, with a lot on her plate right now, but she is visibly doing better than she was a month ago. I am looking forward to truly becoming her friend. Beloved has been her home teacher for quite some time. We have a visit set up for after church on Sunday (we teach the bishop and his family!) and another single sister next week. I am so thankful that Beloved has a testimony of the importance of home teaching and visiting teaching and just service in general; it’s one of the things I love best about him.

We are rotating out the older items in his three month supply. Last night it was a carton of squash soup his mother had picked up on one of their jaunts to Costco. Neither of us was a big fan of the squash soup. I had a single ladle full and peppered it liberally (the man is corrupting me!); he had given himself a larger portion. The rest of it went down the drain, with no apology on his part and zero guilt on mine. You know how I am about wasting food. This stuff fits squarely into the will sustain life category.

Beloved has chemo today. I have the temple tonight. It’s going to be a long day for both of us, but I suspect mine will be significantly more edifying than his. We’ve already begun it with a major, mutual laughing fit. This bodes well.

Tomorrow night we are meeting up with some of the recent graduates from the singles program. Most of them will go on to a movie afterward, but it will be a Friday-after-chemo for us, and Beloved will be tired, and that will be our excuse not to spend some of our Scotland money on a movie. Saturday morning he gets the pump off, and we put me on his bank accounts, and then I hope to just come home and have some serious puttering time in my studio, so that we can get the bookcases moved out of our dining room before we feed the missionaries the following Saturday.

I have not seen my kids or grandchildren since the wedding. I miss them. And we both want to start having one couple/tribe or another over for dinner, and eventually have the grands come spend the night (those who are not allergic to the cat).

Beloved is fixing eggs and toast. I’m going to go make myself useful, as well as ornamental.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

In which Ms. Ravelled gets her packing chewed out.

Yesterday was mostly wonderful. I had a little come-to-office-manager meeting, in which I was counseled to focus. Deservedly so. Work has been challenging since we moved to the new systems in November. I am still struggling to return to my former level of efficiency and effectiveness. I nearly dropped the ball on something important last Friday. This is the first time in the ten years I have been working for the firm, that this kind of discussion has been necessary.

The irony of this is that today will get eaten up by the monthly staff meeting this morning, and this afternoon we have an office-wide corporate-mandated thing that will likely take another two hours. And I have four major projects for Attorney B, two of which need to be completed today for a trial on Monday.

Thankfully, prayer plus work frequently equals a miracle.

My flowers (on the desk at work) are gorgeous and intoxicating. Dinner last night was delicious, and the company most excellent. I do love that man! And he loved the book I gave him, Why Stop? A Guide to Texas Historical Roadside Markers. There was some drama involved in getting it here, but I had great customer service from the Texas Highways staff.

Hanging onto those thoughts as I head out to the kitchen for granola before scooting out the door. I have stuff that needs to get done, out of the office. This would not be the week to take time off...

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Flannel sheets.

We put the flannel sheets on the bed last night. Wow. They’re not all soft and fluffy like the flannel on bolts at the fabric store. This is substantial stuff. And I was toasty-warm all night. I vote to buy a new set every winter until I have enough flannel sheets for the rest of my life.

We tidied up the entrance to the closet in our bedroom. I have yet to find the case for my cell phone. It has been MIA for a couple of weeks now. I think the next step is to take everything out of the closet and frisk it before putting it back. But I’m thinking black hole. It’s the only theory that makes sense.

We ate Vietnamese with the empty nesters last night. Food was better-than-OK; I have two days’ worth of lunches in the fridge, salmon in a red sauce over rice, and very tasty. But still not my cuisine of choice. Beloved was less than impressed with his entree: heavy on the shrimp heads, not so much on shrimp bodies.

I am pleased to report that smooching a man who has eaten shrimp does not set off my allergies.

I need to find the boxes that hold the rest of my clothing. I have been washing and wearing the same stuff I took on our honeymoon, and today is our one-month anniversary. Although this is the perfect excuse to buy new stuff...

Happy V-day, everybody. Heading out to the kitchen for some blueberry hotcakes and non-random acts of smooching. Breakfast in four, says Beloved.

Monday, February 13, 2012

New calling :)

I was set apart after church yesterday. I am the new fourth-Sunday teacher in Relief Society. I will take the assigned General Conference address and build a lesson from it. In my previous stake, we had to meld two or three addresses into a coherent whole. In this stake it will be easier, as there is only one chosen by the stake presidency per month. I teach in two weeks.

Church was good. I have slightly mixed feelings about the new ChiaoGoo needle. The cable has a finely-plied steel wire core inside the plastic sheath. I wish they had had a 40” needle in the shop, as the steel makes the cord less flexible, and the needle portions are a little longer than what I need for this job. It made the gusset decreases on the baby sock more fiddly than I would have liked, dealing with two loops until I had decreased down to 20 stitches on the instep. Now that I am doing a pure and simple Magic Loop, I am very much pleased with the performance.

I waited at church while Beloved did his duty as ward financial clerk. Knitted a little and read the second half of last week’s RS lesson and the first half of the lesson we studied yesterday. I finished that lesson a few minutes before bedtime. So I am now in position to read the lesson for next week, if belatedly obedient and studious.

I made spanakopita from memory, after a short nap. It was pretty good, and next time it will be better. I have been married to Beloved just long enough that I am starting to acclimate to his tastes. I will put in more onion next time, and some freshly-grated pepper, but I was pleased with the onion/spinach/egg/cheese balance overall. And you can’t go wrong with a recipe that uses an entire stick of butter!

I also made a simple salad: sliced baby carrots, grape tomatoes, small red grapes, almond slices, a couple of radishes, a couple of green onions, mine topped with balsamic salad spritzer. I have two days’ worth of salad ready to go, and two portions of spanakopita to take with them, plus a larger container with about three servings of spanakopita that will probably get eaten by Beloved for his lunches.

He fed the dishwasher and did a load of whites and washed the flannel sheets we got as a wedding present; I put them in the dryer. We are having a cold spell, and some areas are getting snow and/or sleet. So we plan to break in the sheets tonight, after an empty-nesters’ dinner.

We are starting to get a rhythm on chores. He’ll wash a load and dump it on the bed. I’ll fold it while sitting on the bed and talking to him as he gets ready for bed. I put my stuff away; he puts his away; we have family prayer, and one of us stays up and putters on the computer for a few minutes.

He wanted to get all the wedding presents out of the living room and into what will become our office. I got that taken care of while we watched [most of] the Grammy Awards. I discovered some singers whose voices I like (Adele, the lead singer of the group Jack Black introduced, the lead of the group that covered the first Beach Boys song), and I thought Jennifer Hudson’s rendition of Whitney’s song was just lovely. Brian Wilson looked a little lost. Glen Campbell and Tony Bennett were heartbreaking. Sir Paul was inspiring. And Elton John in the Pepsi commercials was a hoot!

I’ve paid bills this morning. And mopped the guest bathroom. Beloved is about to fix breakfast. He checked the driveway and road. The sleet woke us up in the middle of the night. It’s wet out there, but no snow on the ground.

This is the part where I mosey out to the kitchen and flirt with the cook. Happy Monday, everybody!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

And another [paycheck] bites the dust.

I got paid on Friday. You would not necessarily know that from the balance in my checkbook. Spa treatment (next time I am getting brave and trying the b****i wax), Costco, Sprouts, Albertson’s, and I finally, finally made it to The Knitting Fairy, hoping to replace my broken 4” size 0’s with Signature DP’s, but they do not (yet, anyway) make them that small.

I came home with a ChiaoGoo 32” circ and have transferred the baby sock onto that for today’s church knitting. The ruana is just too big to wrangle in tight quarters. And the whole point of church knitting is to remain awake and engaged during a three-hour block of meetings, not to say “Look at me, I’m knitting, and you’re not. I’m ever so much cooler than you are!”

I am pleased that we got out of Costco without spending $200. By the time we finished all of our errands (including taking Beloved’s sister to the airport), it was dark, not to mention colder than a bill collector’s heart. But the food is all stowed, and we have a nice addition to our three month supply (more on that in a bit), and I have the makings for a batch of reduced-sodium spanakopita.

I am hoping that when we get home from church the urge to cook which was been tantalizing me since Friday morning on the drive to work, will have returned. Because at the moment it appears to have taken off for Club Med and taken my cheese shaver (one of those triangular thingies with a narrow slot and a handle, as opposed to a traditional cutter with a roller and a wire) with it.

I was trying to explain food storage to one of my non-LDS friends at work. It is such a blessing to be married to a man who keeps the commandments. He and his late wife established a year’s supply of the basics: wheat, honey, rice, dried beans, oils, powdered milk, canned tuna, peanut butter, etc. The sorts of things that will, for the most part, keep for 20-25 years under proper conditions and prevent starvation in case of famine. We also both have 72-hour kits, in case of sudden emergencies. Mine is filled with MRE’s. He has better food, and camping gear. We both need to rotate/upgrade the edible contents of our kits, and I am sure he will be tweaking the inedible portions of mine. We are also counseled to build up a three-month supply of things we would actually want to eat during a period which is neither an acute emergency nor a long term crisis.

With the insurance questions pretty much settled, we can now turn our attention to reorganizing and inventorying our long term storage, so that we can use and replace items that are approaching the end of their usefulness, deal with the 72-hour kits, and build up our three month-supply.

Note to self: put a ball of sock yarn and some needles into the 72-hour kit, and another UNO deck.

This is the part where I blow-dry my hair and put on the one skirt of whose whereabouts I am certain and ogle the man who just stepped out of the shower.

Life is good.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Observing the tribe (his).

I spent a good chunk of the party sitting in the kids’ loveseat with Beloved’s sister, watching the last of the food preparation. What the boys lack in numbers, they make up in volume. All of it, last night at least, good-natured.

The kids’ house is lovely. They’ve chosen a warm neutral palette, and it works. The couch, loveseat, and ottoman are covered in a subtle rust paisley. (All the Beloved menfolk are mad for paisley; works for me. [In Beloved’s case, this would include Brad Paisley, which also works for me.])

When Beloved’s firstborn was married last year, there was a superabundance of food. One of the dishes looked as if it held taquitos. Not a big fan of the taquito, so I passed. I have since learned that I missed eating lumpia, which are Filipino and are to the ordinary Tex-Mex taquito what cashmere is to Red Heart. I did not repeat that mistake last night.

We have slightly simplified our schedule for today. After complicating it a little. We will leave shortly for Arlington. I will drop Beloved off in about an hour at my insurance agent’s office. Beloved wants to discuss some aspects of the homeowner’s coverage in person. While they are doing that, I will be getting my pits and face waxed at the spa. Then my agent will drop Beloved off at the spa on his way to his next appointment, and Beloved and I will go to my bank and put him on my account. I am hoping that the changes do not immediately invalidate my debit card, as I pay a lot of my bills that way. The next couple of weeks could get interesting. I may need to borrow one of Beloved’s gas credit cards to keep Lorelai happy. We are probably going to defer putting me onto Beloved's bank account until next Saturday, as that is less critical than getting my bank account into my new, married name.

And then we scurry back here and pick up his sister at the kids’ house and take her to the airport. They had a good, productive meeting with their mother’s doctors yesterday. His sister put the fear-of-Beloveds into the young and somewhat cocky cardiologist.

Gotta scoot. I need to look up some addresses for Beloved, and one for me. Life is good.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Insert mildly exasperated snort here.

I guess if the snooze alarm is the worst of his faults, I’m getting off easy. Welcome to Ravelledland, Ms. Debra. I tried to go over and say how-do from your comment yesterday, but all I have done is to boost your profile views by three. I’m guessing that you blog privately. I’m always a little curious about how people find me. [Many find me just a wee bit strange, but that’s a discussion for another day...]

Today is going to be crazy-busy for Beloved and me. We are both out the door before seven. Me to the salt mines, and Beloved to pick up his mother and sister for a day of doctor visits. Beloved and his sister are loaded for bear. I would like to be a mouse in the corner.

The snooze alarm just went off a second time. The first time it happened, I told Beloved, “This is the part where you get in the shower.”

To which he responded, “No, seven more minutes.”

And I went “Aughhhh!” hence today’s title.

The second time it went off, he said, “This is the part where I get in the shower,” leaped out of bed, came up behind me and fluffed the girls (sending me into helpless fits of laughter), and said, “Ravel that sleave!”

I think it’s fair to say that I am now thoroughly awake, and he is thoroughly pleased with himself.

In other news, we have made a decision on insurance for the house and the cars, and my insurance agent will be a busy boy getting that taken care of. I’m so pleased that the numbers worked out and I get to continue a long and cordial working relationship with him.

I had a good session at the temple last night. I never know what my assignment(s) will be until I get there, and sometimes my schedule changes due to an influx of patrons. We may look like a bunch of serene and interchangeable blue-haired angels to the temple patrons, but sometimes we have to scoot and scurry without appearing to do so. It’s never the same night twice. I always go home physically tired and spiritually uplifted. Last night was no exception.

May I just say how nice it is to get home less than half an hour after leaving the temple, rather than having to drive an hour (or more, depending on construction) to get to Fort Worth. Not to mention how nice it is to have a lively, loving husband waiting up for me at home. We were both pretty pooped last night, but not too tired to sit and talk awhile before crashing.

I am totally jazzed about the birthday party tonight. Beloved had just taken a German chocolate cake out of the oven when I got home last night and was making the coconut-pecan frosting (all from scratch). He will pick up the birthday cards and the gift cards, and all I have to do is drive home from work and look pretty. I’m not used to that. I could get used to it.

My turn for the shower, before he walks over here and fluffs me again and I totally lose my concentration. Happy Friday, everyone. I hope it’s payday, or that you have a chocolate stash, and that all the surprises will be good ones.

Over and out.

Thursday, February 09, 2012

Home, home I’m deranged

I’m reasonably sure that I’ve used that title before, and it doesn’t really fit how I’m feeling, but I wanted to use it. So I did.

Work is going [suspiciously?] well this week. Attorney B’s secretary is out on vacation, and I’m getting both attorneys’ mail read pretty much on schedule, and their mail out, and my inbox whittled down a little, and the to-do’s checked off as they crop up.

My attorney has been working remotely for much of the week. Sick child, workers at his home, and the usual assortment of depositions. Which means that he will be bringing me a raft of dictation tapes when he returns to the office this morning. But Attorney B will be out, dealing with workmen at his home, and that should keep things fairly calm. I have three new suits that need to be answered on Monday, two for my attorney and one for Attorney B, so we know what I will be doing today. I am just hoping that my PRT (annual performance review) does not get sandwiched in there somewhere.

I am making slow but steady progress on the ruana. I joke about how Beloved is cutting into my knitting time. He reminded me, lovingly, that I am cutting into his reading time. We spend a lot of our evenings just sitting and talking, watching cooking shows, or doing stuff at church or with the family.

The twins’ birthday is tomorrow, so there will be a tribal feast at his firstborn’s new home, which I have yet to see. Like Secondborn’s, it is the largest venue and best suited for when this half of the family gets together. Can’t wait!

I spent half an hour or more yesterday, getting Beloved on my health insurance, which I thought I had done two weeks ago. I had to haul in the big guns from HR, as there was some sort of glitch that prevented my completing the process on my own. I am reasonably tech-savvy. Maybe I should say intermittently tech-savvy. But when I called my HMO to inquire about Beloved’s insurance card, they told me he wasn’t on the system. He is now. And in another 2-3 weeks we can call and get his PCP entered into the system. We can keep our respective PCP’s, both of whom work for the same local physician group, just in different offices. Mine is in Arlington. His is in Richardson. I would drive halfway across Texas to see mine.

Plumber is supposed to come today, rescheduled from yesterday. And next week Lorelai goes into the shop for maintenance and then her safety inspection. On Saturday we are putting one another on our bank accounts: yay for Saturday banking! And then I can deal with Social Security, and we can work on getting the cars co-titled (it is too a word; I just made it up).

This is the part where I log off and hit the shower. Beloved is leaping up to make a good, old-fashioned breakfast for me, as today is my long day. One of his sisters is flying in tonight, and tomorrow they and his mom tackle some issues with her healthcare providers.

I am so thankful to be married to a man who is kind, competent pretty much all across the board, and just a joy to be around.

Even if he is inordinately fond of the snooze alarm, which tends to set my teeth on edge. (He snickered when I read that to him.)

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Wednesday? Really?

Good, productive day at work yesterday. Nice visit with the home teachers last night. Another fantastic dinner before they arrived. Quiet(ish) evening at home with Beloved.

Hoping for another productive day at work today. I have a lot on my to-do list that must get done. Maybe a little knitting in the break room before I fire up my workstation, but I spent half an hour moving furniture around and am running a bit behind. Then more knitting at lunch, and more puttering when I get home tonight.

We broke open the UNO deck last night. I was ahead by over 100 points and had two successive hands that effectively cured my smugness. I was pleased to discover that my formerly excessive competitiveness has cooled somewhat. Somewhat.

Marriage, almost one month in, is even better than I had imagined it might be. I really, really like this man!

Tuesday, February 07, 2012

Stick a fork in me.

Or just fold me up and toss me into a moving box. Every scrap of stuff, and nearly every scrap of dust, is out of the duplex. I was very, very happy there, for over three and a half years. It was perhaps the longest stretch of peace in my adult life. I am grateful for that time in which to study and ponder and serve and grow. Without it, I might not have recognized the jewel that is Beloved when he came into my life. A different sort (and level) of peace has entered my life; I am well and truly blessed. Now I get to help figure out how to turn *his* home into *our* home.

And one of my young friends said, “M&M Dark Chocolate Raspberry - best thing since Hershey stopped making raspberry flavored chocolate chips.” I need to stop at Wally World to pick up another padded envelope to mail the house keys. I will look for M&M’s while I am there.

I knitted up three rows of the Elsebeth Lavold Silky Wool yesterday. Wonderful yarn. I will need to save up and make a sweater from this. And in the meantime it is playing nicely with the other yarns in the ruana.

Today I need to contact my health insurer and request an insurance card for Beloved. I hope that he can keep the PCP he has been seeing, who is part of the same outfit as mine, just in Dallas County, not Tarrant. And I need to let my insurance agent know that I’m out of the duplex. And Beloved needs to get numbers from his insurance companies so we can consolidate policies, one way or the other.

Home teachers are coming tonight. Plumber is coming tomorrow. And I’m skipping Knit Night for two weeks.

Time to go soak my head. Later, gators!

Sunday, February 05, 2012

He’s watching the Superbowl.

I’m typing in here for a few minutes. As I dropped a kiss on his forehead and headed back to the computer, I grinned and said, “I’m married to you. I don’t have to watch the game. Of course, it’s not the Packers.”

I did watch the halftime show and thought it was much better than last year’s, my qualified appreciation for Madonna notwithstanding. At least she kept all her clothes on, and she sang two of the handful of her songs that I like and love to dance to.

I went over to the duplex after church. The oven is clean. The fridge is clean. The shower stall is clean, and I have goosed the bathroom floor with enough 409 to make the final installment of I’m-outta-here a breeze tomorrow night. (As I did not get my nails done yesterday, I’m killing two stones with one bird.)

I have a new calling at church. I am elated. Will share the details after I’m sustained next week.

I broke one of my four-inch DP’s while knitting at church today. I took a baby sock to work on, because the ruana is getting unwieldy. I stood to let someone into our row before sacrament meeting, and I felt the needle snap between my fingers. (Given the chance, I’d still stand to let them sit down with us. I can buy more knitting needles. And will, most likely next weekend. This is one of my relatively new KnitPicks Harmony DP’s, and I’m not crazy about the points on the teensier sizes, although I love my larger Harmony’s like you wouldn’t believe.

Let the record show that with great attention and a generous scoop of patience, it is possible to make progress on a baby sock using three whole needles and two half-needles. Just in case you were wondering.

I’m heading back out to the living room to flirt with my husband, which is even more fun than knitting, watching the Superbowl commercials, or eating raw sugar cookie dough.

Saturday, February 04, 2012

Long crazy day.

I woke up about 5:30 after what I think was a solid night’s sleep. Knitted for awhile, then started moving furniture around. Late in the morning, I loaded empty boxes and the cooler into Lorelai and headed west. The bathroom is packed up; so are the fridge and its freezer. I sprayed oven cleaner inside the oven and will bend the Sabbath ever so slightly by heading back to Fort Worth after church tomorrow to clean the bathroom and kitchen. I have a duplex in the mire, and I have reached the end of my patience with this project.

I had hoped to get my nails done between working on the duplex and coming home for dinner with the missionaries. I ran out of time. (Too much time spent fixing up one corner of the living room before I left.) I did make it to Ulta and pick up another bottle of palest pink nail polish, which was on clearance. So I got an $8.50 bottle for $3.00; way better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.

When I pulled into the driveway, Beloved had manhandled the psychotic loveseat out onto the curb, to be picked up on Tuesday if somebody else doesn’t make off with it first. It’s not pathologically ugly, even if it is my least favorite shade of blue. It’s just nearly impossible to get up out of, once in. And I would rather use that energy for much knitting or other fun activities.

I had a small falling-down in the LYS (local yarn shop) in Fort Worth when I went in to say goodbye. Came home with a skein of Elsebeth Lavold Silky Wool in a lovely garnet, also a hank of Fiesta Gelato in red-to-plum. I wound the former by hand, as I have no idea where my umbrella swift and ball winder might be. I know, I know: in a box, in my studio. I am regretting, slightly, not taking the clerk up on her offer to wind up both hanks for me. The Silky Wool offered little attitude as I slowly and reverently wound it; the Gelato is 100% rayon, a slinky ribbon yarn, and to attempt to wind it without the proper tools would be an express ticket to a rest home.

Beloved tweaked what I had already accomplished; when I came home the other half of the living room was not merely tidy, it was vacuumed and spot-treated. Our living room, and our breakfast table, look like grownups live here! Tomorrow during the Super Bowl he will go through the contents of the hope chest, and I will pack up anything he deems appropriate for donation.

I am now going to attempt to enter my new yarn in my stash on Ravelry, and then I will rejoin Beloved in the living room. He is watching “Chopped”. Thankfully, he does not have HGTV in his TV package, or I would disappear into the handful of shows I’m aware of, there, and get nothing useful done at all.

Have a blessed and peaceful Sabbath, everybody. I will be bending mine mercilessly. If your team is playing tomorrow, I hope you enjoy the game. (My children are scratching their heads and wondering what has happened to their mother. Apparently football fumes are as pernicious as yarn fumes. Who knew?)

Friday, February 03, 2012

The puns are flying thick and fast.

Told him that it was nice to be needed. Or kneaded. He cracked up.

Yesterday was weird. Another good, productive day at work, notwithstanding the first of four quarterly secretarial job function meetings which lasted something over two hours.

My attorney is on vacation today and Monday, so I have a fair chance of getting completely caught up, depending on what Attorney B needs; his secretary is off today and all next week.

My sinuses have inexplicably decided to drain. This is not, in and of itself, a bad thing. I just wish they had waited until tomorrow. Do you have any idea how hard it is to cough reverently in a temple session? Particularly if you are one of the ordinance workers? And I had no voice for much of the evening, due to my efforts to suppress the coughing. I had a pocket full of Mento’s. They helped.

Beloved told me that we had some Mucinex in a kitchen cupboard. My own stash is in one of maybe a hundred boxes somewhere in the house. Sadly, he has Mucinex-DM, which might suppress the hacking but would also make me hallucinate, so that would be a no. I ended up taking a single cayenne capsule washed down with plenty of water, and another one about 4:30 this morning, and not only does my head feel better (I think I cauterized something), but the inflammation in my lower legs is almost completely gone. They have been a little poofy all week, I think from the stress of moving, but never as bad as they were before I started massage therapy last summer.

I was so tired when I got home last night that I was on the verge of tears. Beloved had me in stitches within minutes. Being married to him is better, in every way, than I imagined at my most imaginative.

In a few minutes he will hop in his car, and I will hop in Lorelai, and I will follow him to the gas station and bring him home. His car (unnamed as yet) needs some work. And then it will be Lorelai’s turn, and we will have three functioning vehicles (his is drivable but needs some fairly significant work, as does she).

I am hoping for a quietly productive day at work, and a quiet evening at home. Tomorrow morning I will head back to Fort Worth and clean the duplex, and then I will be done. We are feeding the missionaries tomorrow night. Heaven knows where we will put them, but as Miz Scarlett would say, tomorrow is another day.

Wednesday, February 01, 2012

Checkbook is balanced.

Ms. Ravelled is somewhat balanced. Sorta like the karma chameleon, it comes and goes, it comes and goes... I have also done my taxes (but not yet filed) and will owe the grand total of $28, unless there is some sort of glitch that pops up when I go back and review. My bills are paid, except maybe the phone bill; need to check on that. And the tags on Lorelai, which have to be taken care of by the end of the month, but I want to combine that with switching over to my married name and putting Beloved on the title, as he will be doing with his car.

I am reading an amazing book, And They Were Not Ashamed, by Laura M. Brotherson, CFLE (Beloved says clinical fun lover extraordinaire?), an LDS counselor. It pertains to healthy marital intimacy. We always think we are normal, right? but sometimes it is good to get a second opinion.

Turns out that all the counseling I have gotten for one reason or another, over the years, particularly the spiritual boot camp I did about five years ago, has healed or cured most of my hang-ups. This is a book from a Christian perspective, with more detail than one finds in most Christian books on marital intimacy, and it is specifically written to help good women get over the Good Girl Syndrome.

We spend a lot of time and energy teaching our children to just-say-no when it comes to premarital sex. We spend very little time teaching them that once we are married, God wants us to relax and savor our spouse. Lots and lots of uptight people out there, men as well as women, but mostly women. I tried to teach my kids that married sex was wonderful and worth waiting for, but mostly they did not want to have any sort of discussion about the topic, and I certainly had my own issues to deal with, which I have mostly-done. This is a good book (combined with appropriate counseling) for women who have been sexually abused, to help them wrap their heads around healthy, appropriate behaviors.

Even if you have a good marriage and a healthy sex life, you might learn something. I have learned a lot, and I am only on the first, skimming, read-through. I will go back later (soon-later, rather than eventually-later) and do the exercises. I read bits of it to Beloved. There is one fantastic cartoon, fairly early on, that almost made me weep with laughter.

Time to log off and tell Beloved about my day and listen to him tell me about his. One of the many, many things I like about being married to this man.