About Me

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Five years into widowhood, after one year of incredible happiness and nearly 14 years of single blessedness. Have given up perfect manicures and pretty hands in order to resume playing the soprano recorder and to see if I can figure out how to play bluegrass banjo. Singing in the shower. Still really, *really* love to knit!

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Oh you can’t get a man with a gun

If they ever make an aftershave that smells like gunpowder, I’m a goner.

Re: Brother Abacus, who keeps popping up in my life like mushrooms after the rain. If I were in need of a financial services adviser of impeccable integrity [and had not dated him], I would recommend him wholeheartedly. That being said, the man has left emotional carnage in his wake. And not just with me. He may have too much self-interest to cut notches in the bedpost, as some men do [but his Chapstick is another story].

Pride? Yes. Prejudice? You betcha!

So, as my girls have tenderly pointed out, apparently I am still not quite done forgiving him. I really am trying to be like Jesus. Some days it is easier than others. I managed to forgive their father, for far more. This gives me hope...


Jenni said...

I do agree that you can forgive someone and still not like them a lot. I think you will know when you are all done with him because you won't really care one way or another where he is sitting or who he is talking to etc. That's pretty much how it is for me with the egg donor. When I talk about her or if I saw her, it would be more like an a terrarium exhibit and I would consider tapping on the cage to see if she is awake, but the situation doesn't hold that much interest for me.

Bonnie said...

I can completely understand your frustration. While I think you were far angrier, for far longer on my behalf, at the teenage twit who repeatedly broke my heart fifteen years ago, I definitely struggled with forgiveness. And it took me a good long time before I could think about him with out wanting to throw pies (or something) at him. I'm just glad you are able to embrace your current feelings and take it one day at a time. Just because we throw our past behind us doesn't mean it doesn't hurt when it keeps popping up in the present. But it'll all get better eventually, at least you are working on it.