About Me

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Four years into widowhood, after one year of incredible happiness and nearly 14 years of single blessedness. Have given up perfect manicures and pretty hands in order to resume playing the soprano recorder and to see if I can figure out how to play bluegrass banjo. Singing in the shower. Still really, *really* love to knit!

Saturday, April 12, 2008

“Peaceful, Easy Feeling”

[The Eagles have expressed so much that I’ve felt over the years, from “Witchy Woman” to “How Long”. Particularly, in recent weeks, the latter.] I am trying to understand how it is that, for a woman who used to crave male approval as much as I did, and jumped through as many hoops to get it, I can be sweetly content with my friendship with Brother Sushi. Perhaps because it is a holy thing? We honor the commandments, and we respect ourselves and one another’s limitations.

Which is not to imply that we do not laugh often, and deeply. But not at one another’s expense. We laughed a lot last night, and we covered a wide range of topics. As he signed the tab, he grinned and said, “Well, we didn’t solve all of the world’s problems tonight...”

But yes, there is that sense that when we talk, we figure things out, and sometimes we fix things, and sometimes we get ideas on how to tinker a little more, and sometimes we acknowledge that there is nothing we can do about a situation, other than pray about it and let other people have their agency.

And at the evening there is a heartfelt hug, and he goes home, and I sleep better than I have since the last time we dined.

I got two hugs last night, actually. The expected one when he opened the car door for me, and another while I waited for LittleBit to undo the deadbolt. It was a logical assumption on her part. My car was there, and it was dark; therefore, I was asleep in my bed as I usually am when she comes home. [I cannot believe I got home after she did, last night. Just flat boggles the mind, but then she's had a l-o-n-g week with UIL competitions.]

That’s twice in as many weeks that I’ve had to call her cell phone and wake her up to let me in. At least I haven’t had to get the crowbar out of the trunk and pop a window, like I did the night before Secondborn got married, when Fourthborn was home from Girls’ Camp one day early and sleeping like the dead. And I was standing outside, in the rain at 1:00am after a singles’ dance, and there were two drunken non-English speakers sitting in their car and laughing at me.

Good thing, too: the movable part of the living room window at “La Casa Cucaracha” was about 6” above the floor; my bedroom window here is about three feet higher, and I am eight years older.

LittleBit was so apologetic. And I totally understand her assumption; nevertheless it strengthens my desire to be living in the duplex, where the only three people who will be able to lock me out, are Me, Myself and I.

So what’s on the agenda today?
Haircut
Penultimate monthly drive-by-fooding of the elders
Lunch in BigD with one of the Good Brothers and his friends
Measuring furniture at the junk shop
Possible layaway at said junk shop
Manicure
Buying the digital scale
Drive-by-hugging of the Bitties and their folks
Possible falling-down at what will become my LYS, though I can’t go too nuts there because I have to pay Uncle Sugar on Tuesday.
Shopping at Central Market
Nap?

And knitting, definitely lots and lots of knitting. And maybe some pictures for tomorrow.

1 comment:

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

Oh, I wish I had thought to put a haircut on my agenda today.