About Me

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Five years into widowhood, after one year of incredible happiness and nearly 14 years of single blessedness. Have given up perfect manicures and pretty hands in order to resume playing the soprano recorder and to see if I can figure out how to play bluegrass banjo. Singing in the shower. Still really, *really* love to knit!

Friday, July 01, 2011

Sitting here in limbo.

He has his first chemotherapy treatment today. His mom and new daughter-in-law will be with him, as will our mutual friend who is driving everybody there and home again.

I will be at work. My attorney will be working remotely, and my inbox is nearly empty. I do have one report which must go out today, but I transcribed it yesterday, and it is probably sitting in his outbox. I also have four new cases to open, none of them with an answer due on Tuesday.

Both of the secretaries whom I back up, will be out today. So life could get interesting. One of those attorneys is on vacation; the other has depositions and will be out for a good chunk of the day. Sudden horrified thought: I hope the depo’s are not in our office, where I might be expected to make coffee. Oh well, I’ll burn that bridge when I come to it ;)

I am nearly done with the hatband on the chemo cap. I think this one may end up being solid green, because neither of the two local yarn shops which carry Malabrigo, have the yellows I need. I will order them from Jimmy Beans immediately after writing my tithing check.

I love paydays. This one is basically tithing and rent, with a side order of gasoline and food. And a modicum of yarn.

Emails are lobbing back and forth between the new guy’s inbox and mine. We are talking about Important Things. So that source of stress (the lack of communication) is somewhat relieved, even if the uncertainty is not.

I need time and space in which to write at length, not necessarily for here. That will not be happening today, but thankfully this is a long weekend.

There is a dance in Denton tonight. I am going. I do not know how long I will be staying, but I will be going. I need to move this body, and I need about a bajillion hugs, even if I am currently at the point where I will cry if somebody is nice to me.

This life? It is a soul-stretching experience. And while I would have told you, six months ago, that I had already experienced my own personal Gethsemane about five years ago, I begin to suspect that that may have only been a prelude. And I am okay with that.

I know that God lives. I know that Jesus is the Christ. I know that the Holy Spirit is truly a Comforter. I know that the age of miracles has not passed. I know that the power and authority to speak in the name of the Lord, are invested in the prophet and his counselors. I know that Joseph Smith was speaking the truth when he bore witness of the Father and the Son. I know that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, and that the Bible is also the word of God (insofar as it is translated correctly). I know that prayer sometimes changes our circumstances, and that it always changes *us*.

Tithing check written. Rent check written. Yarn ordered. Life is good.


Jenni said...

I hope you have a smooth and peaceful day at work today. Would you like to come over for some dinner and hanging out Sunday eve?

AlisonH said...

Wishing you many blessings.

Bonnie said...

I love you. I'm glad you two are able to talk about important stuff.